Twelve is a magical age, where life is poised to leave childhood behind while reaching out toward the mysteries of women. Dolls sit on shelves but remain dear friends and babysitting becomes something to strive for, to feed the blossoming feminine need to nurture as well as to earn money for little dreams. Yet on September 11th, for Fawziya Abdullah Youssef (a 12-year-old who should have been a flower girl instead of a child-bride) life ended – awash in pain and blood.

Fawziya bled to death after three days of hard labor, a child forced to become a mother before her time. For most WOMEN it is a traumatic experience (pain of any kind for anyone is debilitating) but to force a CHILD to suffer through it for THREE days is a devastating commentary of sadness and disbelief. Yet, Fawziya is not the first Yemeni child-bride, nor is she to be the last. Unless something is done now to educate and legislate changes to protect these girls from the same kind of horrors Fawziya suffered through, thousands more will follow in her bloody footsteps. Without a minimum statutory age, there is no way to even begin to punish those responsible for this sick slavery.

This is where the hard working efforts of organizations like Equality Now help to make a difference all over the world.

Recent reports find that anywhere between 25% to 50% of the females in Yemen are married off before the age of fifteen – giving them the ghastly earned sobriquet of “the brides of death.” Many like Fawziya (married at a mere 11 years of age) are traded off like cattle to cousins and/or for the promise of high dowries. Little girls and young women without a chance to pursue their own dreams. Do you remember when you were 11 or 12? Do you know of a girl now who is that age? Can you imagine the horrors of being forced into maternal servitude without a say, to anyone with enough collateral to buy you?

Can you imagine dying after three days of horrific pain, giving birth to a stillborn baby – alone and unprepared? Now imagine it if you went through it as a child.

Don’t stop there – use that anger and disbelief and turn that energy toward something positive. Use it to do something, anything because there is always hope when good folk get together. It only takes a minute (at the very least) to donate something to an organization for change, like Equality Now. If you want to do more, you can write letters, speak out in blogs, twitter or get the word out via other social networking sites. Go to one of the remaining CSTS events to not only have a great time, but to donate to Equality Now so they can do more to bring balance to this impoverished area of the world.

If 8-year-old Nojud Mohammed Ali can fight the system in Yemen, and win – just imagine what we can all do together. When her father married her off to a man 20 years older than her, she fought and was granted a divorce. Because of her courage, others are becoming aware of their own rights for childhood, education and the chance to become what they want to be. So it doesn’t matter how old you are, if you fight the good fight, you can make a difference and bring about change.

Join with me in supporting these girls and women and do something for the greater good of all of humanity. Donate your time, talents and pocket change to Equality Now – because that’s what us Browncoats do best. This is the best way I know of “aiming to misbehave.”

Warm Regards,
Anne

This week’s Why We Are Here is a special one.  It is dedicated to all of the caring fathers out there in the world.  Equality moves both ways, and we need to remember that when walking and working with our male counterparts in humanity’s symphony.  There are plenty of wonderful courageous men who work hard for equality right alongside the womenfolk and who practice doing the right thing.  At the same time, there are many who have dedicated themselves to learning how to do the right thing, in spite of thousands of years of cultural influence.  It is because of the education and other programs backed by Equality Now (and other worthy institutions) that these seekers of truth and equality have the chance to change the imbalance.

I was asked an honest question the other day, about keeping the signal going and if it really worked.   The question was not derogatory; this was not an attempt at knocking the efforts of the quest for equality.  Instead he wanted to know with hope in his voice and heart, if the actions of Equality Now and individuals connected with EN and other viable organizations, really were making a difference.  “Yes!”  I said.  Then I proceeded to give him examples of how Equality Now achieves victories in world law, perception and deed with their impassioned campaigns and illuminating education.

In the process of telling and showing, I came across something more.  I found out about the courageous men who are fighting culture and their places within it, in order to bring a balance and harmony back into the world.  It takes a lot of courage to stand up and say no, when everyone else you know and love is either indifferent or worse yet, saying yes.

South Africa’s Bafana Khumalo, offers gender workshops for African men in rural areas, striving to teach them among other things that equality for women will not be the downfall of society.  When interviewed for an article, he tells of how trepidation turned to joy when one of the older men attending raised his hand on the 3rd day of the class.  Instead of fighting what he had been taught all his life and practiced, he told of his illuminating thoughts.  This is what he shared.  “‘Yesterday, after I got home,” the participant began, “I called my sons, I called my wife, and I explained to them what we are doing in this workshop.” He told his children that things had to change in their home. No longer could their mother arrive home tired from a day of work and be expected to cook, clean, wash the dishes and clear up all on her own. It was simply unfair.” (From “Men fighting for women’s equality.”  on Afrik.com – en.afrik.com/article13786.html )

How amazing is that?  Seeds of hope planted in the rocky ground of tradition, spring to life and share their fragrant scent of equality with others – who will plant more.  This is what Equality Now helps bring about.  This is why we, who participate in Can’t Stop the Serenity year after year, continue to support their efforts.  Together we can plant a garden of equality

Our amazing communications guru, Jen Cummings, taught me about something very special, White Ribbon Day.  As their website states: “The White Ribbon Foundation of Australia aims to eliminate violence against women by promoting culture-change around the issue.”  More seeds planted which have bloomed into an international day of celebration and education.  (Quoted from their website at www.whiteribbonday.org.au/About-WRD-34.aspx )

The fine folk at Equality Now are a lot like Mal and the crew of Serenity.  Equality Now does whatever it takes to keep the signal going.  They get the word out all over the ‘Verse about the wrong done against women and they won’t let anyone stop them from doing what’s right.   Furthermore, they fund programs to help others see what’s wrong and how to transmute it to a powerful force of good.

Johann Schiller wrote: “It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.”  To all of you fathers with hearts of gold, we salute you today. (Including my wonderful groom of almost 19 years, who strongly supports my charity efforts, keeps me sane and going strong.)

Please also check out the Men Against Sexual Violence website, located www.menagainstsexualviolence.org/ As you can see, there are so many working to fight the good fight.  With the wonderful men in our lives who strive to do good, we are well on our way to achieving victory.

With warm regards,

Anne Barringer,
2009 Global Organizer
Can’t Stop the Serenity

In the past few weeks, I’ve shared some stories about the cold, cruel and unbalanced world around us and the need to keep the signal going.  But what happens when you do speak out?  Do things change?  The answer is yes – they do.  Some change faster than others but action and speaking out do make a difference.

That’s why today’s “Why We Are Here,” is about the positive side of working to make the world a better and more equal place.  There are two stories I am going to reference today, where Equality Now has helped justice prevail and the winds of change sweep far and wide.

Our first story deals with Zambia and the horrific rape of school girls by their teachers.  Not for the first time, Edson Hakasenke raped one of his students by luring her to his house on the premise of collecting schoolwork.  He threatened her, like so many others, with her expulsion, shame and guilt.  But the girl’s aunt spoke out, forcing the authorities into action.

Nonetheless, justice was not swift.  First Hakasenke fled the country.  Then, upon his return, they arrested him but LET HIM GO, citing there was too much delay in the reporting of the crime.  The aunt found a lawyer willing to take the case pro bono, but they were going against a huge hurdle.

And this is where Equality Now came into play.

Where does the money we raise go?  One place is Equality Now’s Adolescent Girls’ Legal Defense Fund.  With this fund they were able to assist the family’s lawyer with international and legal precedents.  This led to a civil judgement against this sick pedophile and further legal and disciplinary action against him.

But Equality Now didn’t stop there.

The problem of rape and abuse against schoolgirls in Zambia continued unchecked.  One victory is never enough.  So they set up a program to help identify this problem.  Together with Zambian organizations, they put together a plan to stop this heinous crime once and for all.

Then something else happened.  More girls who once had feared to come forward saw the light and sought justice.  Now, because of the support and voice of Equality Now, the laws have been changed and so many girls have hope where once they had none.

Photo from www.wunrn.com

Our second uplifting story is about a woman named Kobra Najjar. Because of Equality Now’s fervent campaigns to save this woman, she recently was released from prison just this month – after 11 years of being imprisoned (the last three years waiting to be stoned to death).

Her crime?  Kobra was forced to prostitute herself by her own husband to support his heroin habit.  When one of her clients killed her husband in sympathy, they branded her as a murderess and an adulterer.

Yet Equality Now worked ceaselessly, waging written campaigns against the system, sending out pleas and letters to anyone who would listen until Kobra’s sentence was commuted to 100 lashes – tantamount to a death sentence.

However, they didn’t stop there.  Equality Now continued to cry out against the injustice and urged others to do the same.  Education, illumination and a heart of gold, fueled  EN to seek balance, to seek justice – and now at long last Kobra is free.

This is why we work so hard each year to help Equality Now, because their actions make a difference in the world.  By helping, we too are making a concerted effort to bring about change.

Henry David Thoreau said:  “It takes two to speak truth, one to speak and another to hear.”  So imagine what we can all do together.  Imagine how many of us there are, so that each time one of us speaks up for those who can’t, another is hearing and passing the truth on.  Now think about the support we give strong voices like Equality Now.  Instead of one set of ears, we are now able to reach thousands of ears.  By taking on the system one woman at a time, they are actually paving the way for hundreds and thousands of girls and women to achieve equality. One light in the darkness can shine enough light to see other shapes huddled therein and is enough to light the fires of hope in the hearts of so many.

So feel proud of yourselves, for all you’ve helped and will help, Equality Now do.  Many of us are pulling our hair out wondering if our plans will all come together for these charity screenings.  Stress may be causing doubt to whisper in our ears, and we find ourselves asking if it’s all worth it.  I simply say look around at how many lights of hope you are shining – and I think the only answer you’ll hear echoing in your hearts is . . .  YES!

Keep up the great work!

To read more about our first story, click here: Zambia: Rampant Rape of Schoolgirls by Their Teachers – Equality Now Women’s Action 32.1, February 2009

For more on Kobra Najjar:

• Equality Now Welcomes News of the Commutation Of Kobra Najjar’s Stoning But Condemns The Sentence Of 100 Lashings To Take Its Place – Equality Now News Alert, Iran, January 2009
• WordPress.com Blog Search for Kobra Najaar

With warm regards,

Anne Barringer
Can’t Stop the Serenity
2009 Global Organizer

“ . . . Because it’s no longer enough to be a decent person.” – JW

This week’s, “Why We Are Here” marks the anniversary of the post which changed my life.  On May 20, 2007, Joss Whedon wrote his impassioned poignant plea on Whedonesque entitled “Let’s Watch a Girl Get Beaten to Death.”

“ . . . I look and I see the earth in flames. Her face was nothing but red.” – JW

For 30 minutes, Du’a Khalil Aswad was stoned to death by more than 20 men (while 2,000 or more looked on) some of them family and friends.  Her own family lured her back, promising all was forgiven, all was well.  Some participants threw rocks with one hand and captured it all on their cell phones with the other.  Security forces stood by doing nothing – and she died in the name of “honor.”

Du’a’s crime?  She loved a boy from another faith.

She didn’t consummate this love, in fact she died an innocent.  No, Du’a merely defied tradition and stained her family’s name with dishonor, JUST BY LOVING THIS BOY.  She became a victim of a real life, perverted twisting of the “Romeo and Juliet” story. AND SHE WAS INNOCENT.  Yet, somehow she was branded EVIL and executed accordingly – and these people, these supposed human beings, believe they are justified and entitled to their sadistic actions.

“. . . If we were all told the sky was evil, or at best a little embarrassing, and we ought not look at it, wouldn’t that tradition eventually fall apart?”  – JW

Many of us have had our parents disagree with the guy or gal we went and fell in love with.  Being a parent, I’ve suffered from the same type of silent worry that these boys were not worthy of my amazing daughters, Beth and Marissa.  Yet no matter what trials and tribulations they’ve gone through, I have never, EVER thought about dragging one of my daughters back home and stoning them to death.  (boyfriends either)

How can anyone enjoy ripping into innocent flesh and causing so much pain to another human being?  How can thousands of people stand by, including family and friends, and do nothing?  Why do any of us allow fear and tradition to handcuff us to our couches, bleachers or benches and then look the other way?  This same kind of thing is still happening to thousands of women and girls all over the world.

“ . . . All I ask is this: Do something. Try something. Speaking out, showing up, writing a letter, a check, a strongly worded e-mail. Pick a cause – there are few unworthy ones. And nudge yourself past the brink of tacit support to action. Once a month, once a year, or just once.” – JW

Du’a Khalil Aswad and the innumerable others who have suffered these unspeakable persecutions MUST be remembered and their stories passed on.  This is the only way we can save others and bring about change.  Du’a’s story stirred Joss; Joss inspires me.  Now, I’m here hoping to in some small way inspire you all to do something, anything to keep it going – because every one of us CAN make a difference.

“. . . Those of you who have followed the link I set up know that it doesn’t bring you to a video of a murder. It brings you to a place of sanity, of people who have never stopped asking the question of what is wrong with this world and have set about trying to change the answer.” – Joss Whedon, “Let’s Watch a Girl Get Beaten to Death.”

I don’t dare you to watch this video.  I urge you.  Yes, it is graphic so prepare yourselves. Remember Du’a as a 17-year-old girl full of love, trust, hopes and dreams.  Watch as they rip everything away from her, and let that anger and disbelief fuel you to helping us make a better tomorrow.

Some of Du’a’s story is here: The girl who was stoned to death for falling in love – Daily Mail

Spread the signal.

This is why I am here.

With Warm Regards,

Anne Barringer

P.S.  For Joss’s entire poignant post: The Cause

Freda Adler, a US author, educator and theorist states: “Rape is the only crime in which the victim becomes the accused.”  Aisha Ibrahim Duhulow of Kismayo, Somalia learned this lesson the hard way – a way that ended in her death.

Imagine you’ve been raped by three men on the way to visit your grandmother, and that you are brave enough to report it.   It is hard to put yourself in Aisha’s place isn’t it?  Because rape is a disgusting, uncivilized sickness – one, we don’t like to talk about.  The courage it takes to come forward is almost inconceivable.  Even if the rapist is caught and brought to justice, his victims who survive suffer for the rest of their lives.

Aisha and her family came forward seeking help and healing.  Instead she was buried up to her neck and stoned to death by more than 50 men in a stadium – as a thousand others looked on.  She was dragged there, already bruised, violated and terrified at a time when she needed hugs and human compassion.  Then, she was executed for “committing adultery.”

Note: While the images below are not from the actual stoning of Aisha, they are to help illustrate what the child went through.

WHAT?

They sent nurses in to check on her to see if she was still alive.  Twice more they would pull her out, only to bury and stone her again. A relative and a few others tried to save her but were driven back by a spray of bullets whose leaded hate then killed a young boy standing nearby.

???

Yes, it gives you pause and you wonder who? how? why?  Yet, there is something even worse to this already horrifying story.

Aisha was only 13.

Yes, a child on the brink of womanhood – she was only 13.

Do you remember when you turned 13- how the world was full of possibilities and dreams just waiting to come true?  Do you remember how it felt to run and laugh with your friends, to have sleep overs, the glorious taste of ice cream, and thoughts of your first crush? If you have daughters or sisters, can you imagine their worlds being decimated and dreams devastated by this filthy crime?  Sadly many of us know this kind of pain and destruction of our precious selves, because it terrorizes us in our own backyards.  Childhoods end and the ghosts whisper of wounds that will not heal.  But then add insult to injury, and execute this child-woman (or any other human) as if SHE is the common criminal.  Shouldn’t you be able to trust in your government and hold hope for some compassion and common human decency?

Stoning Ritual

To be violated against your will and helpless is a thought that turns the stomach and makes one want to look away.  Real death and blood and gore makes you want to go climb inside your bedcovers and hide, telling yourself it will never happen to you and that there’s nothing you can really do.

But we cannot look away from any of it, or it will continue.

We HAVE to stand up together and be heard.  One voice may only make a little noise, yet someone will hear it and join in. And then two sing out stronger until others add their voices in.  Then a beautiful thing happens – unity builds a choir singing for change.  And the song swells over the human consciousness until change happens.  It may take a year, or a hundred years or more, but things can change – and your voice may be all that’s needed to tip the balance.  If you wait, you’ll never know.

That’s why we (CSTS) are here and working so hard to help support Equality Now and our other favorite charities.  That’s why Browncoats use our favorite movie as the backbone to doing good works.  We want the song of change to go out and make a difference, so that no more children, women and men are inhumanely murdered for stepping up and doing the right thing.

Children like Aisha.

Tonight when you look at your children, your nieces, sisters and friends, think of Aisha and her family.  Remember that without action, this kind of travesty will go on.  If you do nothing, it can spread, EVEN creeping and tainting the lives of those you hold dear.

So do what you can and sing for all you’re worth, because as a certain Shepherd Book says, “I don’t care what you believe in, just believe in it.”

For just one of the many articles on this, click here: Somalian rape victim, 13, stoned to death

Warm Regards,

Anne Barringer
Can’t Stop the Serenity
2009 Global Organizer

Join the Facebook page here:  Aisha Ibrahim Duhulow

Other accounts and links:
Commongate.com
BBC News
WordPress.com – Blogs about Aisha Ibrahim Duhulow
Mahalo.com

Mother’s Day – we celebrate it on different days around the globe, but it means the same thing.  It is a day when children of all ages say thank you; a day we can tell our moms how special they are and how much we love them.

Yet in Ciudad Juárez, Mexico, many mothers will only receive meaningless silence and painful tears, instead of flowers and family hugs.  They will not be celebrating with their daughters this year.

And indeed for some, ever again.

Just across the border from El Paso, Texas, Death struts about performing his horrible magic tricks.  Countless women disappear.  Some have never returned.  Those that do are only recovered as mutilated pieces.  It is as if Death owns the town – and maybe he does.  He certainly seems to have some help from high places, officials and others who cover up, or even worse, ignore his tracks.  Fourteen-year-old Esmeralda Herrera, Seventeen-year-old Laura Berenice Remos Monárrez and twenty-year-old Claudia Ivette Conzález Banda are but three of Death’s victims who will never again get to tell their mothers, “I love you.”

Even today, these ever increasing numbers vary depending upon whom you talk to.  Some only count those who have had their lives brutally stripped from them.  Others include the ones who vanished and have never returned.   But their mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers, friends and other family know the truth – because only emptiness echos where love and laughter once played.

Though the tide of new cases is “supposed” to be slowing, many unheard and forgotten mysteries linger unresolved, some of these more than fifteen years old.  Too many recovered bodies remain without names, their families without closure.  Does it matter whether the dead number 300, 400 or more?  Even in a natural disaster that number is staggering.  But these lives are not attributed to any hurricane, earthquake, flood, pandemic virus or even a building bombing.  The same applies for the thousands of women who have just vanished into thin air.  Who will speak for them?

How would you feel if your daughter, just disappeared?  What cold clawing horror would tear itself from inside your heart when she returned to you, in pieces?  All of that beautiful, vibrant life you nurtured, now just decaying bits of flesh and bone . . .  Then imagine your own government ignores your questions and pleas, and when they tell you to shut up, and you don’t . . .  In some cases, those who have questioned the government have been known to disappear.  This horror and travesty shouldn’t be happening in modern times.  Yet, it is.

Yet there is hope.  Because brave people keep the signal going, these silenced souls are finally being heard before the Inter-American Court on Human Rights.  Irma Monreal, Benita Monarrez and Josefina Gonazalez are finally that much closer to forcing the government to address and fix this femicide.  Perhaps soon they will be able to finally obtain justice for their beloved daughters: Esmerelda, Laura and Claudia.  Because of those who have continued to fight the unbalanced system, other mothers will be able to celebrate Mother’s Day the way it should be – with their daughters.

So you see, yes you can help.  Every little action can and does help.  Please start by visiting the links on the next page, spread the word AND THEN TRY TO DO SOMETHING MORE.  Write a letter to someone, either in office or perhaps try and reach out and touch the life of one of the mothers waiting in the darkness without hope.  Donate to a worthy cause like Equality Now – because even your change can be used to help them fight senseless death and corruption.  Send out fliers, make posters or just MAKE SOME USEFUL NOISE by passing this message on.  You are limited only by your imagination and drive.

This Mother’s Day, remember the mothers of Ciudad Juárez in your thoughts and prayers while you celebrate in your own homes.  Remember their daughters but not just as dried ink statistics on a dusty page.  Instead find them in the female faces around you; remember them as beautiful living souls snuffed out before their time, and give thanks for the loved ones in your life.

Don’t let the signal stop.

If you would like to read the latest information on the Court hearing and links about the mothers and daughters of Ciudad Juárez, please click here.

On behalf of the Global Team, we’d like to wish all of you a happy Mother’s Day.

Warm Regards,

Anne Barringer
Can’t Stop the Serenity
2009 Global Organizer

More Information:
www.mujeresdejuarez.org
Wikipedia – Female homicides in Ciudad Juárez
www.libertadlatina.org

The answer to this question varies. Many of us participate in CSTS events and other Browncoat related activities for a number of reasons. We join together to make a difference in the world because we’ve been rallied by Joss’s words to do something, anything. We meet up so that we can share our love of the Serenity/Firefly/Whedonverse, and because we are like-minded folk who want to share other aspects of our lives with our fellow Fireflyians. These are just a few of the reasons we come together in this fellowship

And they are all, very good reasons.

The main focus of Can’t Stop the Serenity has always been to help Equality Now keep the signal going. EN seeks to let the voices of abused women the world over, cry out and be heard. Humanity can listen and come together, seeking to end all suffering and abuse – one voice at a time.

Sadly, there are many cases we never hear about. Some make the news but with so many stories, only a few actually “make the puppet theater.” Meanwhile, how many never reach the ears of the media? We can’t do much about those for now, but we can help spread the word on others.

We can put a face on the cause.

Because it’s not about words on a page, it’s about our sisters in need. The cause is about fellow human beings – mothers, daughters, sisters, aunts and godmothers to name but a few.

So every week for as long as I can, I am going to share with you these very important stories. I would ask that you make time each week to read them, and then to pass them along to your friends and family. In fact, pass them on to anyone you know – it’s just that important.

Honor killings. They seem like old nightmarish concepts from ancient history. After all, in the modern world we’ve evolved, haven’t we? But for 18-year-old Elif from Batman, Turkey, honor killings are all too real. Her sin? Elif wants to continue her education instead of marrying the older man her parents have picked out for her. Her sentence? Death with a caveat.

Imagine being told by your father “You have dishonored your family, please kill yourself.” ??? It’s hard to comprehend that Elif’s very own father tells her to commit suicide – so HE doesn’t have to go to jail for her murder… Horrific isn’t it? And yet this happens to hundreds of women just like Elif every day.

This is why we are here.

Click here for Elif’s full story.

We can’t let the signal stop, nor will we.

Warm Regards,

Anne Barringer
Global Organizer
Can’t Stop the Serenity 2009